The Name Game

It's my hope that while reading UpDades, you not only keep informed on our family's journey through CDH, but that you also get to know Tara and me, if only just a little.  Laughter is a defining trait of our marriage.  Some of my favorite moments together are when we're on long car rides, we're talking, one of us cracks a joke or a smart remark, we both cry laughing, and Tara totally doesn't snort.  When Tara and I found out about Dade's CDH, we decided at the outset that although things will undeniably change, to make it through this, one thing we have to strive for is to come out on the other side still us - still Tara, still D.J., still fundamentally the Stricklands. Without downplaying the seriousness of Dade's situation or the gravity of the information we have posted and will post here, we just wouldn't be us if a little whimsy isn't injected here and there. With that in mind, let's talk about Dade's name.

It's fair to say that little Dade has a unique name, so several people have unsurprisingly asked us how it came to be.  I'd love to tell you that his name has its roots in history, derived from the name of a great Scottish or Irish general, or an English royal far, far, back in my bloodline.

Sizergh Castle in England has actually belonged to the Strickland family for 800 years.  Happy Anniversary, Tara!

I'd like to say that his name comes from literature, perhaps named for the clever, mythological Greek craftsman Daedalus.  That would be appropriate for the son of an engineer, would it not? As is often the case, however, the truth is far more bland - we accidentally made it up.

My criteria for evaluating a name is simple.  I walk up to someone, look them in the eye, shake their hand, and introduce myself with it (I use people I know so they don't think I'm high on something). How does it sound?  Does it assault the ear?  Does the listener cock his/her head like a confused puppy? Does it evoke images of an 80's hair band?  I'll have plenty of opportunities to fail as a parent.  I can't start on his first day by naming him something like "Jed I. Knight".

You thought I made it up.  May the Force be with you, little guy. You're going to need it.

We had several name options laid out for a man-child even before we found out that Dade is a dude, but since I'm a junior (D.J. = Derril Jr. for the uninitiated), I had first dibs deciding his name.  I'd love to have a 3rd, but there were a few complications.

First of all, as much as I love my name, we've got plenty of Derril going around already.  I'm Derril Strickland, Jr. which of course means Dad is Derril Strickland, Sr.  Tara's father is Darrell Parker, so Derril Strickland, III is getting a tad redundant.

Don't lie. You were thinking it.

 Newhart references aside, options for what we'd call him as a 3rd were slim:

• Trey Strickland - It's alright, but it's been done.  
• Tripp Strickland - I didn't even have to introduce with this one to nix it; I just said it out loud. Why? I dare you to tell me this doesn't sound real:

    It's a naysty 'un her at the Talladega 500 tuhday, and the field's purty taht comin' around Turn 6!  Jeff Gordon is leadin' the pack and looks lahk he'll wi.... WAIT! WAIT! HERE COMES TRIPP STRICKLAND MAKIN' A MOVE TO THE OUTSAHD!  HE'S COMIN' UP HOT!  HE'S GONNA TAKE IT HOME ok you get my point.

          Look, if the kid goes that route and brings home the checkered flag at 'Dega one day, I'll splash               Gatorade in the winner's circle right beside him, but right now all I can picture is our own                     version of Ricky Bobby... so no.

Dear 6 lb., 8 oz. Baby Jesus, please don't let my son scream for Oprah Winfrey to put out the invisible fire on his body.

• Trace Strickland - eh... I like the ring of it, but we're stretching it now.  We actually almost went with this one.

What now, then?  Well, we thought about it a while and came up with a few other options.  I even posed the question to my 7th period freshman class one afternoon, but I couldn't get Tara to roll with RichardBenAlbertMitRamsey, III, majestic as it is.  Then one night, it just happened...  We had been over it and over it, and Tara had thrown out stuff like "Aloysius" and "Mervin" (she didn't really, but absolutely would have given the chance) when in a bit of frustration, I finally said, "Fine!  We'll take your dad's Da- (Darrell) and my dad's De- (Derril), smash 'em together.  Dade."  The room fell silent. After a few seconds of this:

It clicked, and our faces changed to this:

"Dade" sounded awesome!  I ran through my testing protocol - "Hi, I'm Dade Strickland."  Sounds strong!  That'll sound great as a businessman, on a band stage (from the lead mic of course), from a football/baseball/insert-sport-here roster, and even if he's a businessman linebacker rockstar!

So there you have it - how Dade is no longer just a county in Florida.

"Team Dade"

Overwhelmed would probably be the best word to describe how we feel right now. Overwhelmed from the Labor and Delivery tour we took last night at UAB. Overwhelmed with emotion, good and bad. Overwhelmed with the unknown. Most of all however, we are overwhelmed by your love and generosity!

A few months ago when we discovered Dade's diagnosis and started to understand the journey we are facing, many of you began asking, "What can we do?"  Like we've talked about in past posts, we unfortunately haven't had anything that most of you could do other than show us support, continued prayers, and be there for us as the long road begins. Many friends have said how helpless they feel (as do we) because they can't do something tangible or hands-on for us or Dade right now.  As you all know, we have postponed baby showers and haven't even registered for gifts just because we truly don't know what his needs will be when he comes home. Several friends, near and far, suggested that we set up a fund for Dade's upcoming expenses. The first few times it was approached, D.J. and I really didn't think it was necessary and politely turned down the idea. As more friends kept asking though, we kept chewing on the idea and came to a couple of different conclusions: 1) We have NO clue what this journey will look like in many ways, especially financially, and 2) many people want to and/or have asked to help specifically in this way.  If we have learned anything throughout this process so far, it's that our understanding, pride, and "how we'd have it" have nothing to do with God's plans for Dade or us in this.  Far be it from us to deny people an opportunity to lend a hand in the way they feel led.

D.J. and I finally agreed, so our friends, Hilary Perry and Katy Mote (thanks, girls!), put together a site where people can lend financial assistance if they like. If you have any questions, you can contact them or join the "TEAM DADE" page on Facebook at www.facebook.com/Updades.  You can reach the actual donation site at www.gofundme.com/TeamDade.  D.J. will add these links to the information bar for easy access! The site allows you to give in any amount, anonymously or otherwise, but please do not feel obligated! The most important part of this is for you to stay updated through Dade's days ahead.

Thank you for being a part of our family's life, and for reminding us how truly blessed we are in all things, but especially in the people surrounding us! Watch God do BIG things in this!!!